Valentine's Day Gift Guide

Want to get that special someone in your life something equally special for Valentine’s Day, but don’t know what they actually like because you only hooked up with them a few times and you know that you can’t “break up” with them on a holiday centered around sex? Well, look no further because here at Pitt Tonight, we meticulously crafted a V-Day gift guide so you don’t have to worry about a thing!

7/11 Big Gulp and a Hershey Bar

Instead of a bouquet and box of chocolates, show them how much you care with classics! Soda is the new flowers! They’ll want to give you a Big Gulp. Sponsored by 7/11.

Dunkin Donuts coupon

Who doesn’t love their morning coffee? Why buy them an actual coffee when you can gift them with the coupon you found in your pocket!

The Only Clean Sock You Found In Your Drawer this Morning

Giving them your only clean piece of clothes is like giving them a blood diamond! It’s priceless except you didn’t die for this one.

Hand Sanitizer and Lube

For a practical Valentine’s Day celebration, use the hand sanitizer before and after. Use the lube during.

That Textbook You Still Haven’t Returned to Chegg

Instead of finally putting it in a box and shipping it back, or throwing it out because you paid all the late fees at this point, give it to your significant other! It is guaranteed they will love a useless textbook for a class they will never take!

Pack of Ramen and Paper Clips

Nothing says romantic night in like a steamy bowl of ramen you can make in your microwave. Take it up a notch with some paper clips you bought with dining dollars at Market-To-Go on sale and fashion them into a beautiful bracelet. Better than any engagement ring! (You’re too young to get clipped down!)

Stale Piece of Bread

It may be at that point where it’s hard enough to almost be a crouton, but not quite, and isn’t moldy yet! Your bae will undoubtedly fall in love with you after this gift! Who doesn’t love bread?

A Cigarette and an Almost Empty Bottle of Evan Williams

Jack Daniels wasn’t on sale when you bought liquor, and now that it’s last minute go time, you need to act fast! Just grab what you have and shower your love with the infinite love of your last cigarette and swig of whiskey.

When in doubt, just give your significant other a card, or send a text message that reads,

“Happy Valentine’s Day!” Chances are, they forgot about you too.